God has plans

got the urge to write about today cos today's so awesome that i want to extract all my creative juices and give life back to my dying blogsite. by the way, got the title from a friend's fb status (thanks yna!).

i've been bugging my sis for quite some time to accompany me to cmc and cal in up diliman to find myself a master's degree program. however, she kept on insisting that she's so busy and have no time to accompany me. yesterday, i was really planning to take the step to bring direction to my pointless life and decided that hell yeah, i'm gonna go to upd and find something to do. lol. and so without giving my sister the choice to say no, i woke up early, dressed up and insisted that i'm coming with her to school. so yah, she agreed. while we were on our way, i BI-ed her and she decided she'll skip her classes to accompany me.

so we got to cal at around 11am, looked for the office for graduate studies and viola! found it beside the dept of sociology at the 3rd flr of faculty center. (whoa with the details) when i came in to the office, the receptionist?staff?assistant?or the dean? was so friendly and accommodating...initially. i told her that im wishing to apply for an ma program this second semester. HOWEVER...my enthusiasm went off when she said, "ay, for first sem ka na." i was like, you mean first sem, 2012???????wtf. and then she asked a follow up question, "anong program ba?" told her im planning to take up speech com and begged to accept my application and yezzzuh! she gave the stuff i have to fill out and everything and told me to submit all of them within the day. ARE YOU FUCK*N KIDDING ME? (that's because the deadline for submission was last AUGUST 12!!!! hahaha) well of course i bargained, gave myself an ultimatum to submit all of them the morning next day. i rushed to my previous office and thank god i have really kind ex-bosses who filled out my recommendation forms, which i would then collect the next day. i slept yesterday with a bothered mind--in other words, i was half asleep last night. lol

this morning, i went to collect my recommendation forms and headed to diliman to submit all of the requirements. got there at around 11am. i handed over the requirements to the receptionist?staff?assistant?or the dean? and after she reviewed everything, she told me to come back on oct 10 to get my admission slip!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! oh my, i was sooooo happy, well i still am. LOL. im excited and thrilled to be a student again. :) everything was just right and i feel that this is where i should be.

just a background, i left my job 6 months ago cos i felt it wasn't for me. looking back, i can say i was so immature for taking my job for granted coz HELLOOOOOO it's not easy to get a job. I repeat, IT'S NOT EASY TO GET A JOB (depending on the context. lol) I took a vacation for 2 months and been looking for a job since may. until today, i haven't gotten any call regarding any job offer. all throughout the process i felt dumb and stupid for not landing on a job. it was degrading that i felt worthless. imagine, im dating with my boyfriend and everything's on him since i left my job. well, it was a tough stuff to go through but im happy that i have the support of my parents even if my mom keeps on reminding me to give my career a good direction (you know, the phrase was not that endearing when it comes from your mother's mouth hahaha). So yah, it's hard yet im still happy because i get to spend that time i wanted with my family. way back when i was still working i felt i always needed to catch up with them that even if we're all under the same roof, I missed them everyday.

now, i'm really thankful that God brought me to this direction. I know we took schooling for granted (if you dont agree with me, you're a geek!) but now, i'm gonna look at it as a better opportunity for my growth as an individual. this is not gonna be easy but i will give my all to finish this and graduate WITH HONORS. <3 to tin, ems, ma'am bong, and ma'am nona and my sister jam, THANK YOUUUUU. this will not happen without your help.

A Beauty Blog :)

I am so back to blogging cos I am a bum again. However, this ain't another rant blog. Today, I'm gonna write something about my latest love--Etude House Products. :D

I was never a fan of cosmetics and beauty products cos I am quite lazy. Imagine allotting so much time for skin care and all. Way back when I was working in a bank, I was able to manage going to work without putting make up on my face. Also, I was not a fan of regularly washing, toning, and moisturizing your face day and night (yeah, sounds a bit unhygienic haha!). I just hate doing all those stuff cos I didn't care about my skin and I didn't care about the way I look either. Now that I'm not working anymore yet I still have all the money in the world (haha, brag), I decided to invest it on beauty products--Etude House specifically cos I like their shop--pink and girly, plus it's being endorsed by famous Korean stars.

So here's a photo of my collection so far (I'm still planning to try on other products especially the AC Clinic line):

(From Left to Right: Aloha 48-color eyeshadow palette, Precious Mineral BB Cream, O2 White cleansing foam, BB Magic Cream, Dr. Oil Solution shine-free finish pact, Dr. Oil Solution dual primer, Dr. Oil Solution shine-free mist, Henna Fix mascara, Mini Size U trial kit, Black Head gommage, Proof 10 aqua tint, Dear Darling Tint, etc. haha)

Most of these items were purchased around end of May and I am quite satisfied with the results. My skin is somehow blemish-free compared to what it looked like before (sorry cos most of my photos are edited so you cannot see how ugly my skin was :|). I'm actually feeling good every time I look at myself in the mirror cos my skin feels fine and soft (try touching my face :D) and it's not that oily anymore. All thanks to Mini Size U and Dr. Oil Solution :). I bought the Black Head gommage recently and on my first try, I can already feel the changes on my 'black headful' nose cos it now feels soft. I'll be writing again about this product once I can fully see the result of my black head treatment. :D Their BB Creams are good too! As you can see, I didn't purchase liquid foundation and concealer cos the cream is enough to make your face look foundation-ready (although I'm planning also to purchase a concealer as part of my collection. I just don't know the product name haha but already tried it when I visited their branch).

I can say that all of these stuff are worth it cos they're much cheaper compared to other Korean Cosmetic Stores and these products really take care of your skin. :D

Can't actually wait for my next Etude House invasion! By the way, the SA's in their SM Sta. Rosa branch are very accommodating. They're more customer-friendly than the SA's in SM Megamall.

SANA

sana feb 14 na.

ang suicidal blog ng isang tamad

bago ko gawin ang inuwi kong trabaho, nag- pasya ako (habang nasa van pa lang pauwi dito) na magba-blog ako. una, dahil hindi ako masaya sa tinatahak kong landas ngayon at ikalawa, namimiss ko yung dati -- doon sa bundok, kung saan malaya ang ibon na nagngangalang ako.

bakit nga ba mas masaya noon kesa ngayon?

1. hindi ko kailangang paghirapan ang perang ginagastos ko noon. weekly, may 2,000 pesos ako na pwedeng gastusin para sa apat na araw na pagpasok sa eskwela. ngayon, 1,500 ang budget ko para sa limang araw na pasok sa opisina. 300 per day-200 pamasahe, 100 tanghalian. eh pano kung gusto kong mag-almusal at meryenda?

2. 3 subjects per day, 1 1/2 hours each. may break pa in between. pili ka ng gusto mong gawin: matulog, kumain, mag-internet, makipag-kulitan sa housemates. Ngayon, 8 hours kaharap mo ang computer at wala kang kalaban labang binabagsakan ng mga trabaho. Yung 8 hours, pwede pang mag-exceed. No choice, you're being paid.

3. ang prof, 1 1/2 hours mong kasama. ang boss, maghapon (maliban kung may meeting siya. hehehe)

4. sawa-sawa ako sa tulog noon. syempre, pwedeng piliin ang sked. bat ba ako pipili ng 7am calss kung may mas late naman sa kanya. may oras pa ko para mag-walwal sa gabi >:) ngayon, after office hours, sabaw na ang utak mo, masakit na ang likod at batok mo, hindi mo na maiisip mag-walwal, itutulog na lang at maaga pang papasok bukas.

5. ano ba naman kung malunod ka sa dami ng reaction papers, reflection papers, exams, kesa gumawa ka ng business report, proposal, inventory, mag-call out sa branches sa buong pilipinas, magtawag ng kliyente at problemahin ang problema ng mundo. I swear, ibalik niyo ako sa academic world at kahit ilang papers pa yan, gagawin ko.

6. noon, may panahon ka para sa mga kaibigan mo. ngayon, alangan ka nang mag-sleep over dahil sleep deprived ka. kanya-kanya na kayong buhay ngayon, kailangan magkasundo kung kailan pwede magkita. kumpara noon, halos maging magkakamukha na kayo sa dalas ng pagsasama niyo.

Ang masakit lang, nakaraan na yan, tapos na at di na pwedeng ibalik.

Ilan lang yan sa mga naisip kong isulat bago ko i-set ang utak at katawan ko na gawin ang trabaho ngayong gabi.

/wrist

marlboro black

alam naman nating lahat na masarap mag-yosi--lalo na nung mga college tayo kung saan malayo tayo sa kanya-kanya nating mga bahay. di natin alintana ang pwedeng maging epekto nito sa ating kalusugan dahil ang mahalaga, may karamay tayo sa saya, sa hirap. hindi ba't ito ang common denominator nating magkakaibigan? kahit pa alam nating nakamamatay, isa ang yosi sa mga nagbubuklod sa atin.

i've been smoking for 4 years now (except weekends, holidays, breaks--so parang yan din ang mga panahong walang student discount sa pamasahe). masasabi kong hindi ako adik kahit ganon. hindi ko siya hinahanap-hanap pag andito ako sa bahay lalo na kung sembreak. tamang chill lang, pag nasa malayo, go lang pag nasa restricted area (bahay) ko, edi bawal at wala akong magagawa. buong buhay ko siyang tinago sa magulang ko. noon akala ko hindi darating ang araw na malalaman nila to. hanggang sa..

lately sobrang stressed ako sa trabaho--physically and emotionally. bukod sa mga kaibigan ko sa trabaho, yosi ang naging kakampi ko para malaban ang bigat na nararamdaman ko. aminin natin, hindi naman siya masarap pero may bagay na hindi ko maipaliwanag kung bakit I feel good kapag nag-yoyosi ako. kahapon, nag-uwi ako ng lighter at half pack, itinago sa pinakatagong bulsa ng bag ko.

linggo, ginising ako ng nanay ko. nawala ang antok ko nang makita kong hawak niya ang yosi at lighter ko. at dahil pupungas pungas pa ko, hindi na gumana ang utak ko para magawan ng paraan na magsinungaling. after 4 years, inamin ko na ang totoo. masakit makitang magalit at maiyak ang nanay ko sa disappointment. alam ko, nagkamali ako dahil may choice naman ako. pero buhay ko naman to, ako naman ang gumagawa ng kapalaran ko at masakit tanggapin na in a way, pinili kong saktan ang nanay ko, pati na ang tatay ko. hindi ko akalain na magsasabay-sabay lahat ngayon. mistulang di ko na maidilat ang mata ko sa kakaiyak. mahirap mag-sorry. mahirap amining nagkamali ka. pero alang-alang sa nasirang tiwala ng nanay ko, hihingi ako ng tawad at mangangakong hindi na na magyoyosi kailanman. kahit pa hinusgahan niya ako, kahit pa nasaktan ako sa mga sinabi niya, kahit sa paningin niya masama akong babae--hihingi ako ng tawad.

NEO ends.

NEO stands for New Employees Orientation, a mandatory 7-day training in the bank where I'm now employed. It started last week and ended today. So why am I telling you all about this? Well, I just want to share my thoughts regarding the way I handled this 7-day training.

Imagine a fish being sent out to a group of starfishes. Yeah I know, my analysis seems kinda weird but all I want to say is that I felt like I do not belong on the first day. It was mainly because most of them are products of the bank's one-day hiring, they've been all together since that day and majority are cliques coming from the same university in college. And so I felt like I was an outsider. For the nth time, I was the ultimate anti-social, introvert, quiet-type person during the first few days of training. I was a bit hesitant to befriend them because they've already established a relationship and you know, the system will go wrong once 'change' comes into that system. Well I hope you get my point. I didn't want to be a nuisance and so I chose to be all by myself--NOT SO ME!!!

As days of my EMO state went by, I discovered myself mingling with these people, telling them some of my life's story and at the end of the day, IT FELT DAMN GOOD. I felt like a doggie being sent out of a cage. :D

And so the 7-day training ended and sadly, I wasn't able to establish a 'stronger' bond with my neo-mates since it's really too late for me to do that. But the good thing is that I had some of them added to my Facebook account. haha and I swear, I won't be suplada when I see them around the workplace.

getting started.

I always belittle my writing skills mainly because I don't really have a good command of the English language and therefore, that makes me a writer that sucks. But I came to realize that writing my thoughts, whether it may be on paper or online, is something I am fond of doing occasionally--especially if I have random thoughts which I think should be materialized (Uh, be seen and read perhaps so that I could decide if they're worth reading or not).

My colleague asked me one time if I blog and I said no. He asked why and I told him that I am not a hardcore type of individual who writes online every emotion he/she is feeling at the moment. Well those really are the ones who have the skill and passion and the mood to do such on a regular basis. That's definitely not me cos most of my sites are like white elephant projects. I tend to get bored easily so I just cancel those accounts after a year or two of dormancy and I am quite unsure and afraid if it's gonna be the same with this account.

Anyhow, I am glad I have something to do after work or when I'm bored--at least I know I'll be doing something productive even if the inputs are worthless.

Why karambola as the blog title? that's how cluttered my mind is. ALWAYS.

Have fun reading my blog, reader. I'll use English as much as possible. (I'm gonna need practice for work. hehehe. :D)